So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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