My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
