Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
