she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
