didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
false alarm. still invincible.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize