Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Soap is not a condiment
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
