make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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