I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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