big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
