you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
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