I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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