around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Drake has all the answers
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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