yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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