Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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