dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Randomize
