no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
