I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
