So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Randomize