I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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