Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
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I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
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I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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