so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
false alarm, still single
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
