You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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