how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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