i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
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