we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
There are leaves in my underwear?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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