The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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