their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
