she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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