my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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