apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Panties = found
Randomize
