Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
