New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
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