Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
4 words: hood of his car
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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