Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
thus making me awesome and them whores
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
