She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
