i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
either way he was missing a nipple.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
