He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
