I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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