Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
