In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Randomize
