D3 body, D1 cock
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
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