I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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