Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
