Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
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if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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