Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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