I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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