ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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