My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I'm at about main and main street
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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