if i died would you start the facebook group?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize