nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize