I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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